I have done a lot of soul-searching this week and this blog sums up some of my biggest learnings …
I really wanted to write today and while many words could easily pour out of Lara Lain right now, I caught myself thinking ”What do I want to say that I think could actually help others?”.
So here we go, I got this – let’s dive straight in;
17 tips for picking yourself up
1.Always be open to who you really are – I’ve seen a few sides to me lately (both old and new) where I’ve had some serious wobbles. Its made me re-evaluate ‘who I am’ and ‘what I am doing’.
I’m constantly on a path of trying to be ‘my best’ and sometimes you just have to accept your best is just you – you don’t have to keep ‘trying’ to be anything – you just have to accept who you are.
You are actually AMAZING. I don’t care who you are or what you do, every single one of us has something to offer to the world and we should always value ourselves. Easy to say, not always easy to do but it’s the TRUTH and deep down, you know it.
2. Be ready to shake yourself up a gear – Over my birthday weekend (last weekend in Singapore) I realised there are a few things I really want to work on over my 33rd year on this planet.
One of which is stopping myself worrying about what I ‘should or shouldn’t’ be doing.
When I was 20 I didn’t give AF about the unneeded word ‘should’, I was too busy living my best life – if you find yourself using the S word – cut it out. It is not needed in your vocab.
You either DO or you DON’T. You don’t need the dilly dally in the middle to freak your head out. 🙌
3. A life coach is always going to be a good idea – I’ve done therapy but it’s not for me for the long haul; it’s always going over the past – who needs that? Let’s LOOK AHEAD to the bright, bright future instead!
I thought about finding a life coach before now but imagined they were super-expensive and I just palmed it off as something I ”might think about another time”. Last week I decided now is the time!
I have signed up for 6 sessions with Faith from Spark Escapes – check her website here. I will write more on this but if you can afford it, I’m telling you right here, right now – look into it!
Faith gives a free session to start and see whether it is for you or not – I knew as soon as we started talking that I was talking to Faith for a reason and signed up to a course of 6 on the spot. Watch this space.
4. See your ”mistakes” as an act of fate – You are going to make mistakes throughout your life – even when you think things are amazing, they can quickly be turned on their head.
Try your best not to think you are the worst person in the world. Yeah you f**ked up, who hasn’t?! Will you care about this in a year? Will you bugger.
Don’t dive into the depths over stupid shit – it’s all part of your journey – without mistakes you would never learn. Just make a mistake the healthiest way possible – look for the lesson in it and think first next time around.
5. When things go wrong don’t let them eat you up – I am the absolute worst for giving myself a hard time in the face of anything that has 1% to do with a result of my actions.
Rather than see the ‘bigger picture’ in plain black and white I will legit try to back-cycle through everything and take all the ‘blame’ on my shoulders to the point I exhaust myself.
I have no idea why I do this, I hope you read this and think ”I never do this!” but I’m guessing I’m not the only one because I can’t be, right?
Giving yourself a hard time is the absolute worst. Get outside, get moving, have a cuppa tea, call your family, read a book – do anything apart from re-living what happened. Give yourself a break, whatever you need to do to relieve pressure from yourself do that. ☕️
6. Read, read, read – check out the stack below. There is nothing like the written word to expand your mind, get a real book or 10 – not Google!
Whatever you are ‘into’ or perhaps need some inspiration/ guidance on its out there! If you don’t read, you should. A house without books is a house without windows. Who wants to live in a pitch-black house? No thanks.
7. Hobbies are good for your soul – When was the last time you really got stuck into something that made you feel happy inside and out? I train, go the beach, read, write but all of these ‘things’ are part of my makeup now – they are my norm. When chatting with my Mum last week I realised I needed to widen my net and bring my life into my life.
… Next weekend I am going surfing. 4 years after arriving into Australia I am doing it. Watch this space. 🏄🏼♀️
8. Say YES! – If someone invites you out; go / If there’s an invite with your name on it; accept / If you’re being roped into something that usually ‘isn’t your bag’; do it – do these new things with an open mind and for the right reasons; to gain life experience.
9. Clean your home – I don’t care how old you are, if you are single, married, have kids, 10 dogs or what; clean your home! Take the rubbish out, open the curtains and let the sun in, hang some new pictures … Take pride in your part of the world and you will feel so much better.
10. Tell your loved ones you love them – I couldn’t tell you how many people I have told I love this week, it’s a lot and I meant it to every single one! When the chips are down, you know who you are running to for comfort; never let people forget how important they are to you. ❤️
11.Be motivated in work – Seeing your job as a challenge with ultimate options for success (and self-improvement) is one of the best ways you can look at it.
If you feel like you are ‘stuck in a rut’ you are wrong. You are actually extremely lucky to have a job at all – so many people around the world would love to be working and they can’t; make the most of what you’ve got, the more you give the more you get out of it. 💪
12. Talk until you are sick of talking – I have had a shitty situation on my mind this week, one of which is now; completely out of my hands.
I’ve talked to myself and my loved ones until I have literally got to now – where I am done with it (to some degree).
If I didn’t talk and seek advice I would have run myself around the bend about it. We are all only human and we need support, we need to vent, we need to feel all the feels in order to regroup and move on.
13. Say sorry – If something has happened and you get the chance to apologise, say it and mean it.
If a person can’t accept your apology are they worth it? I have been through so much in my life where I’m like ”I can’t believe they’ve done this, I would never do that that them” … the thing is, we are all different – people won’t accept what you’ve done, like you won’t accept what others have done to you in different points of time.
If there is no way to hug it out and move past with a heartfelt apology then you have to leave them where they clearly want to be; in the past, a distant memory, a hard lesson.
14. Self care yo’self – Self care can take many forms; physical; new hair, new nails, new clothes, a healthy meal, keeping hydrated and mental; changing how you speak to yourself, changing your mindset when dealing with difficult situations.
On the whole self-care is about doing what you need right then, in that given moment to help you feel better. You must take care of you in the best way you know how – if you are not sure about SC; Google it for ideas but otherwise it’s a case of feeling what feels good for you and doing more of that!
15. Put others first – It will always pay to remember; it’s not all about you. Each and every one of us has things on their plate. Taking a genuine interest in those around you is so important, don’t close yourself off to your own issues in your world/ head … get outside of yourself and ask others how they are, ask after their family, give them a hand with things, offer to be there. 🤝
16. Choose kindness – Try to see situations from other peoples point of view. If someone has treated you badly it’s a reflection of a bigger picture – you can never know what is going on in another persons mind but you can be understanding when things go a bit hay wire.
17. Be open to good things, good people, a good life – Whatever has happened, know and fully believe that this is ”not it” – this is ”just a bump” in the road.
Good things will come to you, maybe not immediately but they will – life is meant to be lived happily, believe it and it will happen, all at the right time. 🙌
This week was my first week age 33 and it was a difficult one, one of the hardest personal weeks I’ve had since I can remember.
On the surface my life is amazing; so full of special people, love, happiness, a great job and a glorious home on one of the worlds most famous beaches … when in reality sometimes things really do go wrong for me too (of course they do!)
… That’s why I wrote this post – as a realistic reminder that even the happiest people can fall off the charts every now and again. That’s REAL LIFE.
One of my friends and I talked this week (she is usually super happy too, like me) and we realised ”90% of the time we are having the best times of our life – and then it’s that 10% when things go wrong we really struggle and our worlds cave in” …
While we can’t always find ”balance” on the spot, when we think that’s the answer – we can ride it out.
That’s something I understand more-so after the last 7 days – we just need to keep going and know that better things are on their way. 💫
Thank you for reading – hope you have a positive week ahead.
Always message me any time, I love to hear from you.